Category Archives: I Heart Animals

Here Pussy, Pussy

By the time you have read this sentence containing the word ‘cats’, you’ll have reminded yourself how you feel about felines. Love them or hate them, felines have a way of provoking very interesting opinions. Oh, this isn’t a post about how great my cats are, it’s a post about being a cat owner and the reactions I get when this fact is revealed. And mainly how men react to this. Oh it can all kinds of useful to be a cat owner!

There’s this one guy, he’s a friend of a friend and so his unwanted advances are a little awkward. I don’t fancy him in the slightest but I know he’s always going to turn up in the pub when I’m meeting a certain crowd. He buys me drinks without asking, won’t let me buy him one back (the old ‘ownership’ thing which I hate) and it drives me berserk when people assume we’re together. A little time ago he very seriously sat me down, ran his fingers through my hair, looked me in the eyes and sighed, ‘Glitter, you know I really like you, really like you but there’s just one thing.. I just can’t be in a relationship with someone who owns cats. I’m sorry but I hate cats! If there was any other way.. but I just hate cats’. It took all my strength not to punch the air with delight! I paused, tilted my head, looked at him and kind of shrugged my shoulders.. ‘Well, I do own cats and I’ll always want to own cats. That’s just the way it’ll have to be then’ – RESULT!!! Mwahahaha…

I was seeing someone a while ago that lived way out of the city centre. I live in the city centre and while I’m prepared for someone else to pay a cab fare back to their place, I’m not prepared to do a walk of shame the next day that involves a bus journey. Public transport in this case, was easily avoided – ‘I know your place is great and it’s so much bigger than mine but I live just around the corner and I can’t leave the cats all night. They’ll need their supper!’ This was normally met with a ‘Bleeping cats’ muttered under his breath as I waltzed out of the pub. Another result! In fact, this is a line I’ve often used. Why risk going to a place owned by a single guy when you’ve no idea when a half empty tube of Athlete’s Foot cream will appear beside you or how many plates in the cupboard were licked clean and returned, how frightening it’d be to see a crusty nose hair trimmer propped up against the taps in the bathroom or a huge block of mouldy cheese in the fridge complete with teeth marks.

And then there’s the very handy, ‘Look! I have to go home and feed them, how would you like it if you simply had to go hungry?!’ This is often met with an ‘Ok, ok, s’pose..’ If at that point I don’t get a belini or a large bourbon for the road it’s easily prompted with the follow up, ‘They’re little rescue cats, you do remember that don’t you? They had a very hard start in life and probably wouldn’t be alive if someone hadn’t given them a home’ … and I’m back in the game!

Recently my newish boss was trying to suss me out. I simply answered the ‘kids’ question with a polite but firm ‘No’. I had previously mentioned I had cats and after asking their names this prompted the very typical male response of ‘Oh I prefer dogs. Dogs are way better. Cats are.. cats are well.. I don’t like cats’. I relayed to him that while I too very much like dogs, the automatic response from a lot of guys is that it’s great when a dog bounds up to you, all tail wagging and tongue lolling, would you really want something that throws itself at you at every opportunity? Is there not something interesting and clever about how cats will observe from a distance and then make a judgement. If a cat shows you any interest you’ll probably want to know what else is going on in that mind. You might even want to see the cat again just to see if it’ll react in the same way or if it’ll do something different, give away a little bit more. The only way you might see the cat again is if you make an effort to see the cat, if you try to impress the cat to gain some trust. You’ll go back to the cat because over time you learn that it’s worth taking some time to find out about this fantastic creature. My boss was laughing as he said ‘I don’t think you’re talking about cats and dogs anymore’ and he shook his head, sighed, asked if anyone wanted a cup of coffee and realised he’d learned a valuable lesson.

I’m also very aware of the ‘single female with cats’ tag 🙄 . Recently I was told, albeit with a few pauses ‘Not to become one of those, y’know, one of those women with cats’. A bit late I thought as I walked away and made a mental note that this guy probably wasn’t the most articulate and that I could probably practice my acerbic lines on him without too much come back.

So what it comes down to is that I’m a cat owner. It’s that simple. Accept it or don’t, it won’t change a thing. I’d rather be me, with my feline flatmates than the girl who’s cheating boyfriend treats her like a doormat or the bitch that everyone hates or the boring girl in the office whose life revolves around her husband and kids or the girl who will settle for anyone because she’s too scared to be on her own.

RIP Fizzy – Our Little VIP

Fizzy2Fizzy died at home yesterday. She was nearly 13 – a great age! Last Friday Fizzy wasn’t at all well and very quickly became quite weak. Our vet couldn’t diagnose exactly what the problem was there and then, prescribed some medication and wanted to see her again within a few days. Fizzy ate a little ham on Saturday but was having difficulty keeping anything down. Over the weekend she didn’t improve and by Monday it wasn’t looking good. We really don’t think she was in pain, maybe a bit uncomfortable. She wasn’t able to eat properly again. My Mom was on duty around the clock [Fizzy lived with her] and with a heavy heart told me that she didn’t think Fizzy would make it. An hour before she was due to go back to the vet, Fizzy let out a cry and breathed her last. Mom was with her, stroking her fur and talking to her. She left a voicemail for our vet a while later to let him know Fizzy hadn’t made it and he rang back within minutes to sympathise, as he’s that type of vet.

Fizzy was a lovely cat, had her funny little ways, the things she did that none of out other cats ever did, things she liked and things she didn’t. Fizzy loved being stroked between her shoulder blades. She loved- and was quite smug about having – her own chair in the sitting room, complete with fleecy blanket. She was a real little rufty tufty and although small, well able to chase away cats and dogs that had strayed onto her patch! Fizzy loved sitting in sunbeams in the bathroom and was partial to roast lamb and pork and white cheese, not red cheddar but white cheddar although she was still happy to get her ears ruffled and a handful of Go-Cat. She also gave Molly short shrift if she got too close, Molly the Boldie would tip her tail, wanting Fizzy to join in and play – Fizzy was the matriarch, the boss, well able for Molly’s antics and only one of them ever gave in and walked away with her tail between her legs. Fizzy was in awe of the real boss though – she’d sit for hours on my Mom’s knee, just staring up at her, quite content. They also used to have breakfast in bed together – I know! – Fizzy would toddle in from  garage and both of them would wait for Dad to bring up breakfast, Fizzy polishing off any milk Mom hadn’t put on her cornflakes! 

It’s funny how attached you get, how attached we as a family have got to numerous pets over the years. And we wouldn’t be without them.

Friday Fallback

 

Ooooooo-oooo I gave you my heaaaa-aarrtttt. Dont go breakin’ my.. don’t go breakin’ my.. Don’t go breakin my hear-ah-art.

Oh don’t be silly! This isn’t a downcast Friday Feeling song! I’m not languishing under a pile of Jelly Snakes and copies of Cosmo looking for some inspiration or should that be aspiration? Anyway.. I’m not blue, or sad, or crying  – oh the flood of Tammy Wynnette and Dolly Parton coming to me right now is almost, gasp, overwhelming, but I digress..

It’s always ok for a bit of Muppet Magic – ye still haven’t lost it guys and eh, pigs! And there’s great synchronised clucking as always from the chickens.

Mind you.. apart from the revelation that Auntie Elton can’t remember the words to his songs anymore and needs an autocue, maybe why this song popped into my head and subsequently hasn’t left it is down to the Tinys. Who are now the Tiny Teenagers… with lots of energy and the ability to scale curtains and sets of drawers in the blink of an eye. The poor curtains. And then there’s the scuttling along the top of my lovely leather couch and the inevitable scraping sound when one of them ambushes the other. Sigh. One of their favourite games seems to be ‘See how much litter we can flick onto the floor from it’s tray’, along with ‘First one to knock the vase of flowers can have first go seeing if she left a window open’. Groan.

Sometimes I think these Tinys are going to break my heart with their boldness… other times I know my heart would break if anything happened to them!

There Will Be…

… a FULL update and proper introduction to The Tinys when they arrive. And once they get their mani pedis and decide between the Louis Vuitton Feline Throw and the more recession friendly Cath Kidson ginham one [hey, they still have standards!] to place their very pampered bottoms on, they’ll be ready for their photoshoot.. hopefully.

Now, as a collective, they are The Tinys – Molly & Fizzy are ‘The Smalls’ [even if Molly the Monster is currently as big as a King Charles] and they now have half nieces and a half nephew, The Teeny Tinys. In the next few days The Teeny Tinys are due to be taken indoors, hand reared and good homes found for them, as what my sis has done with The Tinys. If you haven’t worked this out, the growing brood stems from a feral cat that more or less lives in my sister’s garden. We would love to be able to neuter this cat but our vet has advised us that due to the danger that feral cats pose [and this one is very vicious!], he won’t go near them, no vet will,  not even to attempt a long range dart process and knock them out for the operation. It’s a tricky situation.

Let’s have another pic! This time a good old action one! Missy [mainly black] is on the left and Pinky [yes she’s white, but look at her ears!] is on the right. Meow indeed!

the cats 009

OOOOOhh The EXCITEment!

I’ve moved into my new apartment. I’ve nearly unpacked everything – there’s one large suitcase of clothes still in the bathroom of all places and there’s a small suitcase of ‘stuff’ that needs to be organised into drawers of ‘kinda important, will keep’, ‘not that important, might throw out’ and ‘why didn’t I throw this out before I moved?’. A throw I bought in Argos that so didn’t turn out to be the same colour IRL as it was in the catalogue has to be returned and I’ll replace it with a nice, small end table thingy in glass and silver that I also saw during my several perusals of the entire doorstop of a catalogue.

I’m actually really happy with the way the place has come together so quickly! There’s just one other thing to arrive. Well, ‘things’, plural. Well, they’re not really things. More like THE most fab addition any place could have! You want to know what, huh? Or should that really be who… ? Oh yes, The Tinys are on their way! Who wouldn’t want these little bundles of cuteness to come home to? Who wouldn’t want these absolute dotes to play with and cuddle up to?

the cats 006

My Sister Went on Holiday….

.. and all I got was this T-shirt!

I was presented with this the other evening. My sis and her boyf are just back from Italy and last year she got me some Hello Kitty stuff as well as Italian biscuits and chocs, bits and pieces for mom and some fancy pasta, naturally. I can’t remember where she was the year before, but I’m fairly certain she got me some Hello Kitty stuff then as well.

You see, I heart,  heart Hello Kitty. Handbags are my main HK vice, at the last count I’d over 20 and sure I’ve had HK everything at one point or another. I’m fairly easy to buy presents for in that regard, but perhaps I should really have grown up just a bit by now.

So, when I looked at this t-shirt, a very familiar character instantly came to mind. And I smiled. And then I was slightly taken aback and with eyes like saucers when I turned to my sister, all she could say was ‘I know!‘ and we both squealed with laughter.

So, would you wear this?

HT

Talk About Q-Teh!

Fire is dangerous, Kids. Don’t go near it. Try and stay away, y’hear? You’re lucky, your Mom & Dad are big and know what to do in time of danger. But what if your Mom & Dad are as scared as you? And what if they don’t actually know what to do? What if they went off to look for food and couldn’t find their way back because of some goddamn fire? Huh? What if it all goes wrong and you end up on your own? Fear not, little ones, this is a happy story!

There was another spate of wildfires north of Los Angeles recently, many homes were burned and their owners left with nothing – and this also happened to lots of hoomans! This particular Animal Sanctuary started filling up real quick when bad fire things started happening. All those animals needed new homes! And needed to get temporary homes in the meantime. So, you put a dog here, a few rabbits there, maybe a few chickens and a rooster in another place. But what happens when you run out of space? The rules states that animals need to be kept separate [d’oh!].

A little bobcat kitteh, maybe only 3 weeks old had been found the week before the fires, all weak and dehydrated. He was being lovingly nursed back towards good health when there was another fire survivor arrived, a deer [see what I did there?] little baby fawn. There wasn’t a spare crate to house the fawn and it’s really not the done thing to mix animals -think of the hissing, spitting and general just who do YOU think you are-ness of those kind of scenarios – anyway.. anyway…

When the fawn arrived in the Sanctuary, the little Bobcat kitteh just ran up to it, said hello and they’ve been bessie mates ever since! Don’t believe me? Take a look!

Under the desk;

underdesk (2)

In the hallway;

hallway (2)

Aawwww!

Happy stories people! That’s what we like! Happy Stories!

Molly is 1!

A year ago the cutest little thing, that can also be the most darned terror we’ve ever met was born – our lives would never be the same again. You think I’m joking or exaggerating? Eh, no way!

Let me take you back. After a long illness our elderly lady died. No one would ever replace her and her character lives on in many a story. The time came to think about making everyone happy again. Fizzy was lonely and we were just plain sad.

‘What about getting a kitten?’, I said to my sister. ‘A kitttteeennnn! Just think! A brand new kitten!’

‘Oooohhh, I’d love a new kitten. But it wouldn’t be the same.’

‘I know but.. everyone’s sad. Not to replace the elderly lady, just a happy new addition to the family?’

‘Ok, let’s get one’

The Pet Shop had kittens and Parents were on holiday. Two things that were going in our favour. And all of a sudden, the little girl kitten was ‘on hold’ until my sister could collect her the following day. I would be stuck in work for the week, only able to get properly in on the act at the weekend.

‘What about ‘Molly’? Molly is a dotey name!’

‘We’ll see’.

‘OMG! O.M.G. I’ve just seen the picture of her. O.M.G. She is gorgeous!

‘WHHAAATTT? You’re on speaker, driving. We have her! Oh Jesus! Oh Jesus! Sorry, Oh Jesus. Is she ok? I’ll slow down at the next.. Whhaattt? Yeah! Whhaaat. Hang On’

‘Hi GK. Yep. No. She’s fine. Ooohh sshhhii.. Hang on little one! Are ye ok? Sorry, another corner and every time cos she’s standing up in the box, well, when there’s a corner she kind of topples back into the box! Oh it’s hilarious!’

‘But what do you think? Like, what do you think about ‘Molly’?’

‘Well! Do you know what? We were just saying, weren’t we? We were just saying that she soo is a ‘Molly’. Really. Suits her perfectly!’

Molly spent a fantastic few days with her foster parents, my sis  and her boyf. She had food, attention and toys galore! Pictures were taken, videos were recorded…

Excitement doesn’t describe me before I got to finally meet this furry little thing that I’d heard so much about. When I arrived to my sis’ place, Molly was asleep. On their bed. In like the middle of this huge double bed that seemed to swallow her up. I poked her awake – well, you have to! Well, ok, I had to! I wanted to see her eyes, I wanted her to see me. And when she woke with a bit of a start, I picked her up and cuddled her, told her I loved her and told her that I was so glad to meet her.

There were tears before, during and after the official exchange. Kudos to Molly’s foster parents tho, she knew she was onto a winner – and sure they’re round in my parents all the time. She knows that they’re part of the gang.

There was fascination, intrepidation, hissing, spitting and plain out WTF when it came for Molly to meet her Auntie Fizzy. But the law was laid down and Molly took her place as the cheeky one who underneath it knows who’s boss. 

There was the shock of the introduction when my parents came back from hols – but this is too nice a story to spoil it with the screaming, shouting, surprise and war cries of ‘I wasn’t expecting to come home to a kitten! Kittens are hard work!’, so let’s move on.

To what tho? Perhaps the truth and the fact that at this stage, Molly is no longer ‘little’ [her absolute dedication to eating as much as possible is testament to this!] but she’s a big part of this family. The fact that we know her ways so well that she’s almost predictable – but being a feline, this is never taken for granted and the element of surprise is something she thrives on. The fact that she has the biggest eyes you’ll ever see on a cat. That she is the nosiest parker you’ll ever meet – if it exists, our Moll needs to know what it is. The way we all laugh when she insists on diving onto Dad’s paper when he’s trying to read, yet she couldn’t care less when he’s ‘just’ watching telly.

The way that she’s soo vocal! She chatters and chirps away as she plods around the house, becoming louder to let you know she’d like some more food, confirming that she knows there’s some around. The way that even when she catches and eats a fly or a spider, she manages to look super cute. Her absolute need to be in the thick of things, which can include standing on a worktop and peering over a chopping board, just to make sure she knows what’s going on. Maybe it’s the way that upon opening the front door, she’ll appear, announce that she has ‘stuff to do’ and after a quick spot check she’d like you to open the back door for her to resume her outdoor pottering and checking, thank you very much! Like the time she couldn’t find anything better so brought in a swatch of beige carpet, dropped it beside her bed and off out again she went. She loves getting brushed – she’ll even ‘turn around’ herself when one side is done enough. Don’t stand in her way if there’s a prawn on offer but she’ll hang back when it comes to mushrooms or melted chocolate ice cream [she prefers vanilla]. When she achieves world domination, she’ll acknowledge the part that ‘Go-Cat’ had to play. Her friends the Fish-on-a-String, the yokes with the bells and her mouse friend full of catnip will get prime positions. And when she’s tie tie and needs her sleep, she knows where she’ll always have a bed and most likely saved bits of chicken from that day’s roast dinner. And she’ll purr. And she’ll let us know that she loves being in our house. And when she falls asleep, we’ll remind her of how great she is.

cat-with-hatApologies for the total cr*p quality on the video – I don’t know why it slowed down by like 100 times when I put it up. And just to say, we, or my sister found Molly’s doppelganger – on a greetings card! Much smaller eyes than our Moll and less black fur around the mouth, but with the same grumpy face that every little kid is prone to from time to time!

First Dog!

first-dogSo, the news everyonehas been waiting for – the Obama’s have decided to get a Portuguese Water Dog as the canine addition to their lovely, smiley family. How exciting! Remember how cute is was when [almost President Elect Barrack mentioned that his daughters ‘could now have a dog’, seeing how that’s what they agreed if he got the Democrat vote? Talk about melting! The whole world stopped for a brief moment to pause and lap that one right up!

So, what are these Portuguese Water dogs like anyway? Well, first off, they chose this breed as they need a ‘hypoallergenic’ dog as little Malia is allergic to dogs [imagine? how awful!]and these fellas have a great reputaion; Medium sized, these hardy dogs are lively and sensible but also very loyal, they’re affectionate and good with children, easy to train and I guess, one of the most important things is that they’re so darn cute! Those ears are just crying out to be ruffled!

Obama also mentioned that they wanted to get a shelter dog. Now, I presume that the dog they’ll be getting at the end of April will be a shelter dog, I just couldn’t get confirmation of that. Why the end of April? Well, the family have a little ‘Spring Break’ planned around that time and it wouldn’t do to upset Doggie and take him off on hols or *shock horror* leave him in kennels when he’s only just arrived. And apparently, the arguments have already begun over what the new First Mutt will be called…

Kitten Fail

You’ll laugh at this the second you see it and then scold yourself because the poor wee thing must’ve hurt itself. And then you’ll laugh again, stop mid guffaw but have an uncontrollable urge to share it with someone else.

How many times and with how many cats and kittens have I seen this? We’ve seen the ‘one step and she disappears off the table, even though no one realised she was that close to the edge’, we’ve seen the ‘skids into the wall mush first when trying to turn a corner so quickly that an arse has actually banged against the wall’. We’ve also [oh the shame!] done the ‘shine a torch onto a wall and watch how kitty disappears down the back of the couch’.

There was one time when Molly literally fell from the sky [or the kitchen roof, to be exact], my sister being the only one to see it, thinking she’d gone mad and then poor Molly was found outside, none the worst for wear, just a little dazed. We’ve also laughed at the ‘oh, scratch me more, up on hind legs effort that resulted in a very undignified falling over’, that one came complete with a swipe at another nearby innocent kitty for just being there at the moment of utter shame. The ‘OMG! I thought the bird bath was empty’ ended up with a soggy and annoyed kitty that we had to turn our backs on to laugh, such was the undignified result – you should’ve seen the puss on that face!

Oh felines are a funny lot! I simply can’t decide if I find this funnier than the amount of sympathy I have for the little baby that doesn’t quite make it to the top of the ledge. It’s a bit like Daddy or Chips – how do you decide?!