That’s My Own Business

So Scarlett Johanssen doesn’t like the fact that naked pictures of her have been leaked onto the internet. She’s even done an American TV interview to say so. She feels that everyone is entitled to their privacy and that includes her. As an A List actress and face [& body?] of many an advertising campaign, you could argue that she is where she is today because of her acting ability to a certain extent but just how many of her millions are down to how she looks?

It’s the classic ‘Look at me, look at me! Don’t look at me, don’t even think about it, where’s my lawyer?’ type of behaviour we’re bombarded with from many a person whose front of camera role is a blurred line between the glitter of an Oscar nominated professional part and a sneaky fag or stolen kiss while on a trip to the supermarket. As an actor, TV presenter, musician etc how do you go about the business of show while maximising your likeability i.e. continuing your popularity and not showing yourself up in embarrassing situations such as puking in the street after a big session or getting caught in a menage a trois with strangers? I think I’d start off by not having naked pictures of myself on my iphone.

There are plenty of celebrities that have never been caught up in  sex scandal, a tale of theft or a misplaced misdemeanor because they play the game correctly and understand the rules. They get the fact that the more exposure you have in your professional life, the more you have to be careful of your private life. This isn’t is any way to say that they don’t have a life, it’s just that they don’t accidentally star in a grainy home made bit of porn or go to the club de jour and drunkenly grab a microphone and a bit of boob. A beach exposure for such celebs is a paddle through the edge of the tide with their kids or date night at their favourite Italian is done with their partner beside them. I have no sympathy for ScarJo, none! If she wants a naked pic of herself to present to a lover she has Mario Testino on speed dial to set it up. If she wants to spice up a long distance relationship, hello Skype! If she wants to get up to all sorts, she has several houses to entertain in and surely she’s learnt by now that a ride in a hotel lift doesn’t have to include Benicio del Toro.

There will always be the ‘Gee, I just didn’t know there was a camera’ type people such as Paris Hilton and Kim Kardashian who profit hugely from the fact that little more is expected from them and I abhor such females for letting the side down but when you’re caught out, just call a spade a spade or wait and let the fuss die down, as it will very, very quickly. Getting your PR to arrange a TV interview, shedding a few crocodile tears and banging your expensively manicured hand on a table in defiance at an abominable intrusion when you should’ve known better is not the way to gain more fans.

I did chuckle recently when I read that Hugh ‘Dr House’ Laurie said that most of his underpants are probably stolen from friends bedrooms as no one wants to see him buying  smalls in his local M&S. And he’s right. As one of the best paid actors on TV, I certainly don’t want the image of him holding up a pair of tighty whiteys and comparing them to stripey boxers when all I’m doing is trying to get to the wine section. It brings a whole new meaning to the phrase ‘drop your trousers and bend over’!

So ScarJo, get over yourself, love. You’ve done partial nudity for millions of dollars and are happy for the film to be seen by everyone. You took two pictures of yourself in bed and in your bathroom which are again, partial nudes and you didn’t like that they were leaked. Is it because it’s obvious in both that you took the photos yourself, meaning that you’re now a narcissistic, dirty little girl as opposed to just a sexed up actress? Either way, crying wolf is never the answer.

See the portraits for yourself here

One response to “That’s My Own Business

  1. love

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