Mommy, Will I Look Like That When I Grow Up?

This image literally attacked my eyes in my local shop when all I did was go in for twenty fags and a packet of Hula Hoops. Look at her! LOOK AT HER! Apparently she lives on this planet, the same planet that you and I live on. Yet, she looks so different to what my mirror and me see, when we want to see each other, that is.

Where in the name of bazookas did she get those things? That grocery store should be penalised for making a slip of a thing like her carry such huge watermelons! Although, I’ve heard this girl attempt to speak and bless, she doesn’t seem like she can also carry a big old brain as well as half the contents of the Tesco veg aisle. As for those knickers! Well, I presume she calls them knickers, I would refers to what she has around her arse as a serviette for mice going on a picnic. That is all. *Faints in need of some carbs*



12 responses to “Mommy, Will I Look Like That When I Grow Up?

  1. Would someone explain to me where or what the attraction is that this woman?? 😯

  2. I too was accosted by this monstrous sight in the newsagents yesterday. I think its really sad when the only thing you’ve got going for you is your fake tits. She looks like shes been dip dyed in a bucket of bisto too.

  3. jeeeesus! i think that’s been heavily photoshopped. she looks like one of those rubber blowup dolls 🙂

  4. tina – actually now that you mention it, she does! Gross….

  5. Eh whats with the dog lead????

  6. She shot herself in the foot with her behaviour on Big Brother and now she has to get them out as much as she can before gravity takes hold and she can’t get a job for love nor nipples.

    There has been a turn around this year where magazines ae promoting curvier women and men protest that they don’t find this type of thing attractive – but the magazines sell and until there is a down turn in the sales we are still going to see these fake plastic doll on the top shelves of the newsagents stand. It’s so sad that these girls are looked upon as role models for teenagers and young girls.

  7. glitterkitty

    i almost hang my head in shame while agreeing, lottie..
    how is this wan a role model?
    and i agree about certain mags promoting curvier girls but it seems mainly those aimed at females tho.. the likes of loaded won’t be going down that route for a bit, more’s the pity

  8. Is this photoshop or for real??!!! Ams dipped in Bisto 😆 😆

  9. poppins – all pix in magazines are photoshopped! however, this wan has fake boobs and well, fake boobs tend to be v circular IRL anyway, esp if you go for a big size like she has!
    the -nearly – scarier thing is that she might be that colour walking down the street, somepeople just don’t know where to stop w the fake tan…

  10. GK shocking – what i meant was was this photo “really” on the front of a mag or did someone make it up, i should have worded it differently! But flippin hellthose boobies are WAY too big for her body! for anyones body! dont no how she manages to stand upright.

    Saw a piece on xpose last week – Jordan launching new new perfume, what i noticied more than anything was the boobs!! flippin massive 😯

  11. poppins, that pic IS currently on the front of ‘Loaded’.. it really did ‘attack my eyes’ in the shop!
    and as for Jordan.. well, i fear for her being near a naked flame.. she’s soo far from what she was born with :rolls:

  12. Dorothy Darker

    Perhaps she was getting ready to play a game of double-handed basketball when the photographer surprised her! Or perhaps she misses her dead grandfathers so much that she got their bald heads attached to the front of her chest. One shouldn’t judge the lower orders and their quaint little ways, you know!

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