Lipstick Jungle, read my lips; Tiresome. I was eagerly awaiting the start of this show and after two episodes, I don’t think I’ll make it to a third. From the book by Candace Bushnell, this is billed as Sex and the City for girls who already have it all. So, that’s ok then, sure that’s us all covered.
The opening credits, hmm, I’m not sure, Manhattan skyline, this isn’t helping me move on from SATC. Opening few scenes, oh puuurrrlease, hand me a bucket, I think lunch is on it’s way. We’re supposed to see the three main characters as three girls who have it all, are strong, powerful and oozing with sex appeal, what could possibly be wrong, save the odd blip regarding lipstick choice? Well, there’s a heck of a lot wrong with this show. First up, we get the fashion designer’s fashion designer, Victory Ford, lambasted in the press for her latest collection. Cue crying big wet tears into the sleeves of her cashmere jumper while her friends, who’ve run to her aide without so much as a child washed in the house, pat her gently on the shoulder and tell her they love her and that she’s to go back out there and get’m. So, when she’s down on her luck, what should happen? Oh yes! A ‘gazillionaire’ asks her out to dinner, not that he loved her clothes form the front row of the fashion show, just that well, y’know, he really admires her. One date later and her walkup resembles Kew Gardens, a few days later he sends his private jet to get her away from the nasty lady in Japan and he tells her that he can’t help but want to be with her while they snog on the runway. Help me here, is this going a bit too fast for you too?
Brooke Shields character, Wendy Healy, is the hot shot film exec. She’s married, so that means her husband and kids have to practically make an appointment to see her. So far, so predictable. While shopping with the other girls, she takes a work call, heads back to the office, makes a quite frankly very risky snap decision and Voila! She saves the day! She’s brilliant! Cue entire office in impromptu standing ovaltion. Meanwhile, at home, her husband is as horny as a jack rabbit, her kids walk around like zombies and she just sits back in her top of the range leather chair, allowing her hard-working eyebrows take a two minute powernap.
Nico Reilly is the sassy, streetwise magazine editor with the wandering eyes. Oh, it’s not that she doesn’t love her husband, it’s just that, well, you know, when a kinda cute, nubile young thing comes along she has to kiss him! I’m not really sure what happened with this character for the rest of the episode. Her hot and heavy panting as the young fella sucked her neck open was quite off-putting. At one stage I thought she was hyperventilating.
Yawn. I think I’ll go outside and watch leaves fall off the trees, at least that’s more exciting.
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