Ah Crap

Everything I own is my stuff.. right?Just stuff I own. It’s my stuff, not anyone else’s and if I choose to actually put tacky fridge magnets from the town of my parents last holiday destination on display, well, I can stick them wherever I want to! And although it’s gone way beyond a joke at this stage and I don’t even try and refuse them, they’re not like my favourite things in the world, ok? They just make up part of ‘my stuff’, stuff you’ll find in my apartment.

Like anyone else, I can confirm that I’ve lots of ’stuff’ – you might want to refer to yours as crap. Ok, we all have loads of crap. The crap that sits in a drawer, hangs in a wardrobe, stands on a bookshelf or bathroom shelf. Chances are though, the real crap you have only ever sees the light of day when you’re convinced you’ve spare batteries somewhere, that you’re certain you have a picture of that ugly guy you once dated to compare him to your ex over a bitchy bottle of wine or when you’ve turned the whole place upside down looking for a particular lipstick you know you bought, never wore and now need. There’s also the crap you have kinda on display or at least in the top drawer in your bedroom/ bathroom, the type you know everyone else has but it’s also the type of stuff you shove further out of sight during the 5 secs you have to do a quick tidy up upon arriving home unaccompanied, if you get me.

It’s a little different from the ‘Me Casa, Su Casa’ situation, it’s more like a ‘My Crap, My Situation – so what? ‘ kind of thing. Put it another way, I’ve loads of books, very varied, from books on iconic magazine covers, to all of Candace Bushnells books, some Erica Jong, the complete stories of Winnie the Pooh, a few Douglas Coupland and an abundance of cat books. Many of the cat books are presents, I may add. I have hard back editions of ‘The Ultimate Cat’ and ‘Tales from the Animal Hospital’ from the BBC series years ago, for instance. Guys aren’t so taken with them, unsurprisingly and they leaf through ‘501 Must See Movies’ or my Brett Easton Ellis instead. Mind you, I’d rather the pisstake comments on my cat books rather than the time I was completely at a loss for words when a new neighbour invited me in for a welcome glass of wine a few years back – I’d never seen so much crap until that evening. Perhaps if I added that it resembled a sanctuary for chintzy china dragons and that floral plate things that were just stuck up against various walls and that this guy, yes guy had added a neon blue, neon blue, strip light around a window and odd looking Russian Doll type ornaments on every surface, you might understand why I was a little dumbfounded. Now, his place was really full of crap! I think what I was able to do was agree that he got great, ahem, bargains at the local auction house and thankfully got out of actually agreeing on how eh, lovely the place was now that he’d eh, done it up.

So.. I have stuff. Stuff.I prefer ’stuff’. Over the last few years I’ve thrown out loads of crap. You know the kind of stuff. The kind of stuff you know that you don’t need. Really don’t need, even if you might think you might want  it some.. eh.. time in the far off distant future. I’ve thrown out black bags full of clothes [relatively ok looking with jeans 100 years ago] and others just with either knickers [baggy gusset] or socks [mostly single]. I also love doing a big cull of various things that gather, like cards from certain people I now hate, buttons in dainty little envelopes from a swishy boutique when I don’t even know what item of clothing it belongs to. Take out menus! Crappy bits of paper with my horoscope from a day something great happened, cinema tickets, airline boarding cards - I collected loads of them over the last few years but they’re all gone now. Pens with glitter ink [cos they're actually very hard to read, I've always resorted back to a Biro!], they’re all gone. Cat stickers. Beer mats. Hair bobbins even though I hate my hair tied up. Soaps from hotels. Receipts. Sewing kits that only now have turquoise and lemon thread cos I used the 2 inches of black thread it came with but thought I might need eh.. lemon thread one day.

So, being very truthful, there was very little I threw out when I was moving. All the crap had been thrown out during various booze fuelled culls after yet another guy had let me down. Honestly. I just have grown up stuff now. I’ve only had grown up stuff for ages now. The tiny Elmo was a present and well, he likes living on the bookshelf… and well, the red ladybird moneybox goes with my red living room… and ok, the purple handbags, especially the one with the flowers aren’t exactly the most practical for actually carrying things around in, given they’re rather small size.. but they go with the main theme of my bedroom…  and em.. ah, you’ve got to give me the Elmo! Everyone needs an Elmo!

I Know…

… that I’ve been fairly crap at updating Glitter See Glitter Do over the past fornight or so. I know! I’ve been really lax. See the thing is, that when I moved into my new place, it seemed that every day there was something I was trying to track down. If it wasn’t a lightshade or a cushion of just the right colour, it was side plates or a new lasagne dish. And then there’s all the time I’ve been spending staring like a loon at  looking after the tinys, making sure they were settling in ok. Rest assured though, normal working order will be resumed shortly!

One thing, you’ll just have to wait a little longer til I download the great pix of the tinys I have in their new pad – I need to find the camera software and install it on this laptop – but it’ll be worth the wait! I promise! Meow over and out!

A Bit Ahead of Myself

This moving apartment lark comes with a lot of ’stuff to do’ [as mentioned below]. I’m now no closer to moving, in any way shape or form despite numerous phone calls trying to organise the ’stuff’, but of course, I’ve already decided on colours for each room and have a fair idea as to how each one will look.

The bathroom is going to be blue, well have blue accessories, the bath/shower/basin/toilet are all white, and I already have a really nice clear shower curtain that has blue flowers on it, so hence the choice. I put blue towels up the other day and I plan on having things like blue toothbrush & holder, blue soap etc. The huge mirror is nearly the width of the room and I think some of those squishy stickery things that go on glass or mirror in the form of fish and shells etc is called for as well.

The living room will be red. This choice has kinda been made for me as there’s a fab red leather with chrome legs couch arriving in the next few days, an unwanted cast off from the landlady. My couch is taupe/beige so a red throw will be going over that. The room is really bright and sunny and from experience, light muslin material thrown over a curtain rail can really work, so I’ll get some of that in red. The walls are white but I think white cushions would be asking for trouble, maybe I’ll do a bit of mix n match, a few other colours strewn about will do and I’ll paint my bookshelf red and keep the vase I have with the big bunch of bright yellow fake sunflowers.

The kitchen is all white but again, I couldn’t leave it like that so I’ll def be adding in lots of splashes of colour. I’ve a bright yellow kettle and toaster, I’ve multi coloured cutlery [chunky plastic, go with anything!]  and crockery, so I might end up just using lots of bright colours against the white. I’m fairly decided on pink/purple for my bedroom – mind you again, that’s mainly cos I’ve now two redundant purple throws that have kept my beige couch beige and some matching cushions that are past their best so I wouldn’t care if they spent a lot of time on the floor rather than the bed. And the fact that lots of ’sheet’ sets are pinky/purpley in colour will make purchasing easier. Paint my big set of drawers to match, get some purple muslin for the curtain rail and that room with it’s white walls is done!

I don’t really understand doing up a room in ‘neutral’ colours, but sure you’ve already guessed that!  Now all I need to do is figure out where the kitten basket is going to go….

Moving On Up

I’m moving. That’s right, I’m actually moving from my little shoebox in the heart of Dublin 6 and I’m moving a whole southside postcode away to Dublin 8. I’m moving into a great apartment that’s way bigger than where I’ve been for the last, ahem, 7-ish years [OMG! I've been here 7 years?] and so I’m also moving out of Rathmines.

I’m very familiar with my new place as it’s actually where my eh, Ex used to live. Is that a bit weird? He used to live there, he has moved out! Hell, I practically lived there for months bar a few weeknights when I’d actually trundle home to my shoebox to pick up more clothes and bits and pieces. Are you thinking it’s weird that I’m moving into my Ex’s place? Oh! He’s def not there anymore, he moved out a while back into a place he owns in order to do it up and for a change of scenery. So, when I move in, it’ll be just me. And the reminders of all the time the two of us were in the apartment. Nice.

So, why am I moving in? Well, I really like the apartment and I do think I’ve been in Rathmines too long. HQ will always be there and I can go visit whenever I want. And sure the other regulars will always be there as well! And while the rent is higher than what I pay at the moment, I’m still getting this place at less than the going rate – which is too bargainicious to turn down, right? I know the area I’m moving too and as it’s city centre, I’m only 10 minutes walk from Grafton Street. I’d be stupid not to move in. Has the weirdness subsided? How about I tell you that my Ex’s Mother owns the apartment? Yeah, she does. And now that my Ex is my Ex, I’ve met his mother. She’s delighted I’m moving in as we’re getting on like a house on fire!

So between now and next week there’s a few things to do; properly clean my new place, yes, the guy left it not quite clean enough, what a shocker! I was there yesterday, oh I already have keys, and while I got over the weirdness of being back there on my own, there’s a bit of elbow grease required to have it gleaming. I need boxes, I need to throw out I’m guessing one third of my crapstuff, I need to pack, I need to be able to get into the car park with moving van, which entails a call to the management company for a key or keypad code [the ex didn't drive], I need to activate the ESB and NTL, I need to order [but not pay for] a new fridge freezer and cooker and be there when they’re delivered, I need to coordinate couch suite swapping with my new landlady, I need to unpack and then I need to relax!

Sure nothing to it! And yes, I’ve already mentally decided where everything will go and what I need to get to put my own stamp on my new place! And I would think the Ex will be putting in an appearance at some stage, make sure I haven’t run out of milk or something…

And They’re Off!

Glitter is taking a trek out West for a few days – I’m off to Galway Raceweek! I love going racing! Mind, I have to admit, over the last two years I didn’t so much as make it out to Ballybrit, preferring to watch from the comfort of a seat in whatever pub over the few days. Sacrilege? Hmmm.. maybe, but if you’ve ever been on say Shop Street at 8pm on Ladies Day you’ll know that the combination of grass and loads of people can become a fairly muddy affair and I’ll take the craic and buzz around the city centre, see more of the racing close to a big screen over the battle that is getting to the bar or tote out at the racecourse. Oh, it’s not that the racing is incidental, it’s not, its just that there’s so much going on right across the city that it’s better to be in the thick of it, ready to hop to the next pub rather than spend ages waiting for a shuttle bus and then getting stuck in traffic.

I’m staying with friends, the bathroom thing each morning is fairly painless, even with a majority of females in the house and then there’s always a few drinks around the kitchen table when we all manage to get home late at night and that’s only either side of the great days. Oh I can’t wait! And sure I’ve met loads of people that live there now, those that are part of the gang. I’ve two frocks waiting to get their first airing, there’s a new handbag to swing over my shoulder and well, any excuse to climb into my skyscraper shoes!

I’m not even going to hazard a guess as to how much [read little] sleep I’ll be getting over the next few days and thankfully, I’ll have a few days to recover before going back to work.  What I do know is that I’m going to really enjoy myself!  See you next week.

Hindsight Is Wonderful

A post on another blog got me thinking today – credit where credit’s due, Lyndsay! This is a toughie though, what would you tell the 21 year old you if you were to meet her/ him? Some days I feel that so much has happened since I was 21 [which isn't today or yesterday] and then other days I wonder what on earth I’ve been doing in the ahem, few years since I was that age.

The first thing I would tell her is – and I’m so annoyed that I’m using a classic ‘Mammy’ line – time doesn’t stand still and that it won’t be that long before before you consider yourself old[er] and wonder where all that time went. Aaaarrgghh how depressing! But, FFS, it’s true! So don’t sit on your arse procrastinating about what you’ll do when you grow up!

For me, my twenties were all about adjusting. Adjusting to life after college, adjusting to having a job and earning my own money, adjusting to the big, bad world – to use a terrible cliche. Some things you have to move on from. Some things you have to take a run and jump at, maybe with your eyes closed because it’s not something you actually want to do but you realise you can’t avoid. And also about adjusting to people outside of the cosy family scenario, working with people you don’t like, sharing a house with people that are initially strangers and getting used to the fact that they do things differently to how you do them.

Another thing I would say is to question when and why you feel comfortable with any given situations. Comfortable can be good, if it’s different to a situation you didn’t like but comfortable can be bad when you’re just plodding along, letting things pass you by. Comfortable was my downfall in my 20’s. I stayed with a guy too long and ’wasted’ years and I stayed in a particular job too long as well. I’m not going to say I regret either as I learned a lot about both situations in hindsight and sure that’s the main thing, moving on and learning from mistakes!

Definitely I found that I’ve become happier within myself now that I’m a couple of years into my thirties. I’ve been through shitty times and really shitty times but have come out the other end. Sometimes you really have to put everyone else aside and concentrate on looking after number one.

Which stems from my next point of picking and choosing your friends. In college you’re in a big gang, that gets smaller after college and gets smaller again as people move away with jobs etc but there comes a time when you have to realise that you’re not still in the school playground. There will always be a loudmouth bully who dictates what you do as a group and where you go as a group – sidle up to the person you really like hanging out with, the one who makes you smile and who you form a really good friendship with and let the others do whatever they like. When you have a bit of money it’s always great to be part of the cool gang but they won’t be on the end of the phone when you’ve a broken heart and won’t care if you’re struggling to pay your rent.

Accept that people are different. There’ll always be someone that lands a fantastic job, always someone that seems to jump from one perfect relationship to another. There’ll always be someone with more money than you and there’ll always be someone that has less money than you. There’ll always be people you don’t like and there’ll always be people you envy. Accepting your lot in life isn’t easy but when you do, the smiling makes up for anything you think you may have missed out on.

My final point would be to say that if you’re sad or lonely or just not happy, the only person that can really do anything about it is you. Therapy can be great, getting someone else to help you see things another way, having friends to listen to you and suggest how you could change things. But when it comes down to it, you have to get yourself out of the hole, decide to pick yourself up, get on with things and do them for you alone. Having friends and lovers to share your days with is fantastic and if they really love you the dark nights will become shorter and shorter. So don’t have regrets, they’ll eat away at you, just live your own life and make the most of it.

Guilt

There was a really good drama on TV recently and the story and how it unravelled got me thinking. I was really intrigued by the issues the main character became embroiled in, how it all happened and where it could’ve ended up.

Very wealthy Asian family. Daughter being pushed into an arranged marriage she doesn’t want and she resents her brother’s ‘playboy’ lifestyle outside of the strict family unit. Family chauffeur is in love with the daughter, sees she doesn’t like her now intended husband. The chauffeur first drugs and then plants drugs and incriminating photographs on this guy, he gets caught through a tip off, a criminal record and his reputation is in ruins. The chauffeur tells the daughter he ’saved her’ from an unwanted marriage and wants a ‘reward’. The daughter agrees to sleep with him as a once off. She starts to hate her double life of sneaking off to her nice English boyfriend’s house and playing the dutiful daughter at home. She is intrigued by the chauffeur, his devotion to her and initiates more sex with him. For the first time in he life she feels like she’s making her own decisions.

She starts to lose any control she had when her intended husband turns up demanding to know why she ruined his life, that he knows she had something to do with his downfall. He puts two and two together and realises her chauffeur is starting her motor in more ways than one and obviously this can’t become public knowledge. As she looks on, the chauffeur kills the guy and promises to get rid of the body. Her real boyfriend wants to meet her family, wants to prove he can in fact be a good husband. He impresses her father so much that there’s an announcement that he’s ‘lending’ his now future son in law money and that they’re going into business together. The daughter feels more trapped than ever and tries to lose herself in her clandestine affair with the chauffeur.

When a body turns up and it’s identified as her ex- fiance, she starts to panic – he’d made many allegations against her when alive. The net closes in. The chauffeur loves her so much by now he’s willing to do anything for her. He quite literally loses himself in a crime of passion. He  ’forces himself’ on her, tells her to say he confessed to the earlier murder before he ‘rapes her’ and then he stabs himself. Dying on his lover in a final act of allegiance, to all intents and purpose, it looks like she killed him in self defense, when in fact, it was her faithful devotee that has, most likely saved her reputation. After all, how would a respectable, well educated girl like her ever get involved in drugs and murder?

The drama ends with her on her wedding day to her English boyfriend, the one she supposedly wanted to be with all along, the one that her father now approves of and is in business with. But she doesn’t look happy, she looks trapped, all over again. Trapped by her desire to stay the pampered princess, still trapped by her family, trapped by what she knows and trapped by her lies. If anyone found out what she was an accomplice to, her life as she knows it would end. Her guilty face says it all.

What would you have done? Owned up to knowing the chauffeur had killed your ex fiance? Owned up to having an affair with him? Owned up to wanting to be free to live your own life, even if it can only start after a jail sentence? Owned up to taking advantage of someone else’s desires and using them to protect the privileged yet materialistic lifestyle you had grown accustomed to? Or simply said nothing and lived with these secrets for the rest of your life?

Face Value

You’re reading this because I like to write and so I started this blog. Most of it is of a kinda personal nature, other bits and pieces aren’t, they’re maybe news items or beauty product reviews etc. I’ve been very flattered by the amount of people that read this blog and for the many, many comments and I hope you continue to visit here. But and here’s the thing, you and I chat about lots of different things, my opinion, my relaying something that happened, you commenting in reply, it’s quite easy really so let’s stay friends cos I’d love if you kept visiting!

 So, it’s a nice little thing we have going, me and you. It works! I start a conversation, you chip in a few words if you’re so inclined and we wake up tomorrow and do it all again. When you’re not here you have your own life, that I know and that I get. I don’t demand when you visit, I just like when you do! And equally, if I don’t want to talk about something, I don’t, if I want your opinion, I’ll ask and I can happily rely on your support. If I felt like you absolutely needed to know what I’m up to every minute of every day, well, you’d be following me via Twitter. But the thing is, I’m not a Twitterer, I’ve never written a Tweet and I won’t be either. I just don’t see the point. And I don’t follow anyone else’s Tweets either. If I want to know what any of my friends are up to I’ll text or ring them and ask to meet for a drink. And as for following the Twitterings of whatever celebrity, hello? what is all that about – it’s almost like an acceptable form of stalkingand really, really, why would you bother? If you don’t know this person IRL so to speak, why would you want to know that it’s sunny where they are on the other side of the world? Or that they’ve just had great fish & chips? Or indeed anything to do with their bodily functions?

A while ago I succumbedto Facebook, after a number of people asking if I was on it and then a friend that’d moved back to New Zealand saying it’d be the best way [ie cheapest!] to keep in touch, I decided to sign up. I’ve a pic up, just the one, taken a few years ago and it’s more about the signpost in the background rather than being able to recognise me [I'm also wearing sunnies] and I filled in a bit of the profile-y type stuff. I requested to be friends with those that had been asking me to sign up and accepted more friend requests within a few weeks. I don’t find Facebookthe best thing since sliced bread. I find a lot of the ‘What are you doing’ type posts very mundane, cringe inducing and don’t bother clicking into music or group postings that other put up. The odd time I’ll do a quiz one of my ‘friends’ has done and compare results – if I really have nothing better to do. And what is it with people putting so many pix up on their profile? Really?! A few people I’m friends with literally have hundred’s of photos of themselves on view. Hundreds! Talk about vanity… Get over yourselves!!

I did ponder for a bit when I got requests to be friends with the brother of and the cousin of a girl I used to be very good friends with. Then I got a request from her as well.

Not Always Black and White

OK, it’s been niggling at me for over a week now. That little voice in the back of my mind, reminding me that a very good friend of mine told me straight out that he ‘didn’t like McSmile and in fact didn’t think him good enough for me’. The fact that he told me his wife agreed, confirmed a double whammy power blow that has been etching away at my decidedly bruised ego.

I should also say that I’m perhaps a bit guilty of only relaying the times when McSmile has pissed me off over certain things to this couple. It can be downright excruciating and eyeroll inducing to have someone stand beside you, squealing with delight at the fact that their new boyfriend even breathes on his own, so I tend to shy from mentioning the good side to McSmile, not wanting to sound like a gushing buffoon – if you remember that scene in ‘Friends’ when Chandler walks out of the apartment, Monica is standing all wide eyed and smiley in the kitchen watching him leave and then Phoebe stands right beside Monica, leaning her head to one side an says in a really girlie voice ‘My boyfriend is so dreamy’, you’ll know what I mean!

But, the thing is, I’m now angry that these good friends of mine have a very tainted view of McSmile and being perfectly honest, I doubt there’s anything I could ever do to change their minds. And this makes me sad. But I’m also very happy today as I had such a good time with him over the weekend! It wasn’t an out of the ordinary weekend. We didn’t do anything spectacular or go anywhere wildly exciting. It was just really nice and it’d been the first time in a few weeks that it was just the two of us for the entire time, no meeting others, no bumping into people we knew.

So, cringe alert, I feel that it only right I for once relay the ‘good’ stuff that happened in the last 48 hours. He made me laugh and then laugh some more. I got a full rundown of what happened at a gig on Friday night and as we know each other much better now, it wasn’t hard to picture some of the scenes, exactly how he relayed them. He told me on numerous occasions that I was looking really good. He went out to the ATM, got me money too as I held the fort in the pub but I know that he spent more than me, he earns more than I do and so doesn’t expect me to pay for 50% of the night. He was really encouraging when I told him I was planning on doing a Creative writing workshop and perhaps a Fiction course in the next few months. He told me that he didn’t know what it was, but that I was looking really good and that I’ve looked better than ever in the last few weeks. He didn’t even roll his eyes when I gave him an update on what Molly and Fizzy had been up to during the week! He thanked me for keeping an eye out on the TV screen nearby – ‘From Dusk til Dawn’ was on and he hadn’t seen it, I’d said that I knew he wouldn’t want to miss that Salma Hayek scene and duly gave him a heads up when it came on. We laughed about it and agreed that he’d do the same for me if it was Christian Slater and still hasn’t complained about my increasing excitement that Fernando Verdasco should get good ‘camera time’ during Wimbledon next week. He was worried when we left as I’d no jacket, he offered me his and when I refused he said I was to let him know if I was cold on the walk home. Once in his place, he opened wine and handed me a glass and left me to peruse the iPod and choose whatever - this is an increasingly common occurrence, a very big deal if you knew how different our tastes in music are!

Yesterday, as we chatted in bed, he asked if I would like to go out for lunch – a timely question as I was gearing up to ask the same. We ate in a pub that had the tennis on [Queen's Club] so that I could watch it, he doesn’t have much interest. He paid for lunch without a flinch, even though I would’ve offered to pay half and we walked out of our way home because I wanted to get an ice cream from a particular place. It was all very relaxed back in his place, more paper reading, shared bags of crisps and a general feeling of being comfortable doing nothing together. A ‘guilty TV’ love of ‘The Hills’ always has us turning in amazement to see the others reaction to a particularly catty comment or look and then minutes of laughing out loud, surmising what might happen next. More shared vino and general chit chat between two people that had spent over 24hrs together, with no one else in between and we went to bed. The last thing I can remember is him wrapped around me on my side of the bed and this morning when I woke up I was wrapped around him on his side of the bed.

Where Is My Mind?

*Deep Breath* Where IS  my mind these days? My head is so full of stuff that I only seem to get some time to think about, y’know, important stuff when my head hits the pillow – and even then my absolute need to read from whatever engaging book I’m trawling through will halt the thought process for a bit – it’s no time at all before I’m struggling to keep my eyes open and I’m asleep with none of the days problems sorted. Or perhaps having not fully mapped out potential ’stuff’.

I really need to get my hair cut and I’m thinking of trying a new hard to get appointment at salon, so when should I book it for and how far in advance, seeing as my plans change daily? Fizzy should really have that operation on her tooth soon, it’s no a biggie but a few months back the vet advised her to have it within a few-ish months – Lord! An operation, how much will that cost? A couple of hundred that I don’t have right now? BTW – where is all my money going? Why do I still feel like McSmile is going to drop a ‘You’re Dumped’ bombshell – even though he told me last week he didn’t want to break up with me. I feel bad that a good friend of mine is recently single and not working at the moment – but it’s quite difficult to arrange to meet him, I should try and fix that. I’m not fit – sure I’ve gone swimming for the last 2 nights, doing 2000m in total but that’s nowhere near what I should be doing. What’s going to happen to the new kittens that the stray-ish Mammy cat that lives in my sister’s garden – my sis is very attached to them already. We had a really great day in work today, lots of money came in while we were all in a meeting – but tomorrow could be full of cancellations and that means lots of silence except for general sighing in the office. I can’t remember the last time I actually cooked a meal, bar throwing a pizza into the oven, in my place, I’m really over there to grab clothes, shower/ wash hair, my rent is cheap enough to say that I’m paying for ‘general storage’ of my stuff – but this can’t go on indefinitely, living between 3 places but I’m not moving into parents nor McSmile’s on a permanent basis, no siree! Am I getting itchy feet again? I feel like I could up sticks again, some kind of job or volunteer type job with a place to stay etc, could tempt me no matter what part of the world. I’ve been going on about losing weight for a bit now, I just need to lose maybe half a stone, lose the old ‘muffin top’ and I’d be happy – or would I? Am I focusing on losing weight cos I’m not dealing with other stuff head on? Bollix – I really want to buy that new Dior eyeshadow palette but I think it’s 2 pay days away. Earlier my Dad casually said how he had to go to the hospital tomorrow for blood tests – they’ve found nothing so far [he's been having a general check up for a few months now, monitoring etc] and these are genuinely just routine, he’s just back from playing a game of tennis for God’s sake, but I’m still worried. And Mom’s back is very sore today – why? No idea, it just happened. I’m still pissed off that My Other Dad and The Glamorous Blonde said they don’t like McSmile – so what do I do about the Galway Races? I normally stay in their house. Trying to book a hotel or even a fecking mattress with a bit of shelter and running water is hard at this time of the year, everything’s so booked up. And I want to go to the races, me and McSmile can do our own thing and just meet up with the gang whenever. Well at least it looks like he’s getting his job contract renewed – so there isn’t as much chance of him skipping the country now – his plan should he be let go here. I still have to organise a feckin’ smear test – I haven’t had one in ages. And there was that raised mole that appeared on my back that I got checked out – I got the all clear for that at least *phew*.

Is it time for bed yet? Or time for a thought-erasing cocktail, at least?